Two days before a father gives his daughter away in an all-American east coast wedding. Two days for a seemingly safe world of wealth and privilege to unravel.

59-year-old patriarch Winn Van Meter is heading for his family's retreat on the pristine New England island of Waskeke. Normally a haven of calm, for the next three days this sanctuary will be overrun with relatives and friends as Winn prepares to marry off his daughter Daphne to Greyson Duff.

Winn has never really understood his daughters. Daphne is pleased to be settling down with a fine match, even though she's heavily pregnant at her own wedding. Her sister Livia has foolishly allowed her heart to be broken by Teddy Fenn, the son of her father's oldest social rival.

The Van Meters have gathered to celebrate, but long-buried discontent and simmering lust seep through the cracks in the revelry. Winn, having spent his life following the rules of the east coast upper crust, must now confront his failings, desires, and humanity.

My name is Sophie.

This book is about me. It tells the heart-stoppingly riveting story of my first love. And also of my second. And, okay, my third love, too.

It's not that I'm boy crazy. It's just that even though I'm almost fifteen, it's like my mind, my body, and my heart just don't seem to be able to agree on anything.

The World's Strongest Librarian is an inspiring memoir that takes you through the life of Josh Hanagarne, a Mormon kid who found salvation in books and strength in weight lifting.

Josh's journey begins at the age of six, when he first starts exhibiting symptoms of Tourette Syndrome during a school play. This condition escalates to nightmarish levels by the time he reaches his towering height of 6'7" at the age of twenty.

Determined to conquer his affliction, Josh tries everything from dubious remedies to drug regimes that leave him lethargic, and even Botox injections that paralyze his vocal cords, rendering him voiceless for three years.

However, an eccentric, autistic strongman teaches Josh the art of "throttling" his tics into submission through strength training. This hobby becomes a way of life and an effective method for managing his disorder.

Today, Josh is a librarian at Salt Lake City's public library and the founder of a popular blog about books and weight lifting. He is also a proud father, navigating life with humor and candor, overcoming his disability, and finding love.

This memoir illuminates the mysteries of Tourette Syndrome and explores the contrasting worlds of strongman training and modern libraries. With humor and insight, Josh's story is one of resilience and hope.

Stephanie Plum has a whole lot of trouble on her doorstep. Her Uncle Fred has disappeared and Grandma Mazur is convinced he's been abducted by aliens. Meanwhile, Cousin Vinnie has asked her to bring in the vertically challenged Randy Briggs who's jumped bail. But instead of coming quietly, he has taken up residence in Stephanie's closet.

The mysterious man called Bunchy is trailing Stephanie in the hope of tracking down Fred. And Benito Ramirez is back from jail, quoting Scripture and vowing to introduce Stephanie to God - face to face. Thankfully Joe Morelli, the irresistible cop, is still around to give her the odd sleepless night - though now he faces tough competition from the enigmatic Ranger...

A guy walks into a bar car and...

From here, the story could take many turns. When this guy is David Sedaris, the possibilities are endless, but the result is always the same: he will both delight you with twists of humor and intelligence and leave you deeply moved.

Sedaris remembers his father's dinnertime attire (shirtsleeves and underpants), his first colonoscopy (remarkably pleasant), and the time he considered buying the skeleton of a murdered Pygmy.

With Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls, David Sedaris shows once again why his work has been called hilarious, elegant, and surprisingly moving.

You Are A Badass is the self-help book for people who desperately want to improve their lives but don't want to get busted doing it.

In this refreshingly entertaining how-to guide, #1 New York Times Bestselling Author and world-traveling success coach, Jen Sincero, serves up 27 bite-sized chapters full of hilariously inspiring stories, sage advice, easy exercises, and the occasional swear word.

If you're ready to make some serious changes, You Are a Badass will help you:

• Identify and change the self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors that stop you from getting what you want
• Blast past your fears so you can take big exciting risks
• Figure out how to make some damn money already
• Learn to love yourself and others
• Set big goals and reach them

By the end of You Are a Badass, you'll understand why you are how you are, how to love what you can't change, how to change what you don't love, and how to use The Force to kick some serious ass.

Customer (holding up a book): What’s this? The Secret Garden? Well, it’s not so secret now, is it, since they bloody well wrote a book about it!

Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops was a Sunday Times bestseller, and could be found displayed on bookshop counters up and down the country. The response to the book from booksellers all over the world has been one of heartfelt agreement: it would appear that customers are saying bizarre things all over the place - from asking for books with photographs of Jesus in them, to hunting for the best horse owner’s manual that has a detailed chapter on unicorns.

Customer: I had such a crush on Captain Hook when I was younger. Do you think this means I have unresolved issues?

More Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops has yet more tales from the antiquarian bookshop where Jen Campbell works, and includes a selection of ‘Weird Things...’ sent in from other booksellers across the world. The book is illustrated by the BAFTA-winning Brothers McLeod.

No Kidding, comedy writer Henriette Mantel, along with Jennifer Coolidge, tackles the topic of actually not having kids. This fascinating collection features a star-studded group of contributors—including Margaret Cho, Wendy Liebman, Laurie Graff, and other accomplished, funny women—writing about why they opted out of motherhood.

Whether their reasons have to do with courage, apathy, monetary considerations, health issues, or something else entirely, the essays featured in the pages of No Kidding honestly (and humorously) delve into the minds of women who have chosen what they would call a more sane path.

Hilarious, compelling, and inspiring, No Kidding reveals a perspective that has too long been hidden, shamed, and silenced—and celebrates an entire population of women who have decided that kids are just not right for them.

Jack and May are back for another adventure in the world of fairy tales with a twist. This time, they're on the hunt to learn May's true identity after the surprising reveal in Half Upon A Time about May's grandmother's real intentions.

Searching for answers brings Jack and May to the world of the Sea King, landing them right in the center of a battle between mermaids and the Pirate Bluebeard.

The laughter and action are as nonstop as ever in this next book from new author James Riley! Twice Upon a Time is the second book in the Half Upon a Time series.

In a magic kingdom where your name is your destiny, 12-year-old Rump is the butt of everyone's joke. But when he finds an old spinning wheel, his luck seems to change. Rump discovers he has a gift for spinning straw into gold. His best friend, Red Riding Hood, warns him that magic is dangerous, and she’s right. With each thread he spins, he weaves himself deeper into a curse.

To break the spell, Rump must go on a perilous quest, fighting off pixies, trolls, poison apples, and a wickedly foolish queen. The odds are against him, but with courage and friendship—and a cheeky sense of humor—he just might triumph in the end.

The irresistible, ever-curious, and always bestselling Mary Roach returns with a new adventure into the invisible realm that people carry around inside. America’s funniest science writer takes us down the hatch on an unforgettable tour.

The alimentary canal is classic Mary Roach terrain: the questions explored in Gulp are as taboo, in their way, as the cadavers in Stiff and every bit as surreal as the universe of zero gravity explored in Packing for Mars.

Why is crunchy food so appealing? Why is it so hard to find words for flavors and smells? Why doesn’t the stomach digest itself? How much can you eat before your stomach bursts? Can constipation kill you? Did it kill Elvis? In Gulp, we meet scientists who tackle the questions no one else thinks of—or has the courage to ask.

We go on location to a pet-food taste-test lab, a fecal transplant, and into a live stomach to observe the fate of a meal. With Roach at our side, we travel the world, meeting murderers and mad scientists, Eskimos and exorcists (who have occasionally administered holy water rectally), rabbis and terrorists—who, it turns out, for practical reasons do not conceal bombs in their digestive tracts.

Like all of Roach’s books, Gulp is as much about human beings as it is about human bodies.

The Maleficent Seven: From the World of Skulduggery Pleasant is a brilliant and hilarious one-off novella set in the Skulduggery Pleasant universe, crafted by the number-one bestselling author Derek Landy.

This time, it's the bad guys who take the stage. Tanith Low, now possessed by a remnant, recruits a gang of villains—many of whom will be familiar from previous Skulduggery adventures—to track down and steal the four God-Killer level weapons that could hurt Darquesse when she eventually emerges.
Also on the trail of these weapons is a secret group of Sanctuary sorcerers, and doing his best to keep up and keep Tanith alive is one Mister Ghastly Bespoke.

When the villains around her are lying, scheming, and plotting, Tanith needs to stay two steps ahead of her teammates and her enemies. After all, she's got her own double-crosses to plan—and she’s a villain herself…

"The shrinkadinks think I have a screw loose. Ain’t playing with a full deck. Whacked-out wiring. Missing marbles."

Irreverent, foulmouthed seventeen-year-old Cricket is the oldest ward in a Catholic boys’ home in Maine—and his life sucks. With prospects for the future that range from professional fighter to professional drug dealer, he seems doomed to a life of “criminal rapscallinity.”

In fact, things look so bleak that Cricket can’t help but wonder if his best option is one final cliff dive into the great unknown.

But then Wynona Bidaban steps into his world, and Cricket slowly realizes that maybe, just maybe, life doesn’t totally suck.

Welcome to Earl’s All-You-Can-Eat diner in Plainview, Indiana, a home away from home for Odette, Clarice, and Barbara Jean. Dubbed "The Supremes" by high school pals in the tumultuous 1960s, they’ve weathered life’s storms for over four decades and counseled one another through marriage and children, happiness and the blues.

Now, however, they’re about to face their most challenging year yet. Proud, talented Clarice is struggling to keep up appearances as she deals with her husband’s humiliating infidelities; beautiful Barbara Jean is rocked by the tragic reverberations of a youthful love affair; and fearless Odette is about to embark on the most terrifying battle of her life.

With wit, style, and sublime talent, Edward Kelsey Moore brings together three devoted allies in a warmhearted novel that celebrates female friendship and second chances.

Every teenager wants to fit in and be just like everybody else. So imagine how hard that is when your father runs a taxidermy business out of the family home, your mother runs the student cafeteria, and your sister has just been elected high school mascot, which means she walks the halls in a giant bird costume. But as Jenny Lawson grows up, falls in love, gets engaged – in a way that is as disastrous as it is romantic – and starts a family of her own, she learns that life’s most absurd and humiliating moments, the ones we wish we could pretend had never happened, are the very same moments that make us who we are.

This is an often poignant, sometimes disturbing, but always hilarious book from a writer that dares to say your deepest and strangest thoughts out loud. Like laughter at a funeral, it is both highly irreverent and impossible to stop once you’ve started . . .

Finding Freia Lockhart is Australian author Aimee Said's debut novel, featuring an authentic and fresh voice that resonates with young adult readers. Freia Lockhart is struggling to fit in at her high school. Her best friend, Kate, is fixated on joining the popular clique known as the Bs: Belinda, Bethanee, and Brianna. Freia feels like a turkey surrounded by flamingos when she's with the Bs, but she's determined to keep her friendship with Kate.

When Kate persuades Freia to try out for the school play, promising it will be an opportunity to mingle with the cute guys and the Bs, things don't go as planned. Freia ends up working on production lighting alongside the rumored bad boy, Daniel. As she gets to know Daniel, Freia realizes that first impressions can be misleading. When Daniel needs a friend, Freia takes a stand, risking her reputation and her tenuous position with the Bs to support him.

Amidst the drama and complexities of teenage life, Freia discovers a surprising new group of friends. Her dry wit and insightful observations about her peers, her 'ancient' parents, and life in general, will strike a chord with readers. The story of Freia Lockhart is a journey of self-discovery, embracing one's true identity, and understanding what really matters in life.

Maggie Silver has never minded her unusual life. Cracking safes for the world's premier spy organization and traveling the world with her insanely cool parents definitely beats high school and the accompanying cliques, bad lunches, and frustratingly simple locker combinations. But when Maggie and her parents are sent to New York City for her first solo assignment, her world is transformed.

Suddenly, she's attending a private school with hundreds of "mean girl" wannabes, trying to avoid the temptation to hack the school's elementary security system, and working to befriend the aggravatingly cute son of a potential national security threat... all while trying not to blow her cover.

The first night after Caroline moves into her fantastic new San Francisco apartment, she realizes she's gaining an intimate knowledge of her new neighbor's nocturnal adventures. Thanks to paper-thin walls and the guy's athletic prowess, she can hear not just his bed banging against the wall but the ecstatic response of what seems (as loud night after loud night goes by) like an endless parade of women. And since Caroline is currently on a self-imposed dating hiatus, and her neighbor is clearly lethally attractive to women, she finds her fantasies keep her awake even longer than the noise. So when the wallbanging threatens to literally bounce her out of bed, Caroline, clad in sexual frustration and a pink baby-doll nightie, confronts Simon Parker, her heard-but-never-seen neighbor. The tension between them is as thick as the walls are thin, and the results just as mixed. Suddenly, Caroline is finding she may have discovered a whole new definition of neighborly...

In a delicious mix of silly and steamy, Alice Clayton dishes out a hot and hilarious tale of exasperation at first sight.

We Live in Water is a darkly comic and moving collection of short stories by New York Times bestselling author Jess Walter. This suite of diverse stories explores personal struggles and diminished dreams, marked by the author's wry wit and generosity of spirit, making him a favorite among booksellers and readers alike.

These stories range from comic tales of love to social satire and suspenseful crime fiction. Journey through hip Portland, once-hip Seattle, never-hip Spokane, a condemned casino in Las Vegas, and a bottomless lake in the dark woods of Idaho. This is a world of lost fathers and redemptive con men, of meth tweakers on desperate odysseys, and men committing suicide by fishing.

In the title story, "We Live in Water," a lawyer returns to his corrupt hometown to find his father, who disappeared 30 years earlier. In "Thief," a blue-collar worker turns unlikely detective to solve the mystery of which of his kids is stealing from the family fund. "Anything Helps" sees a homeless man trying to raise money to buy his son the new Harry Potter book. In "Virgo," a newspaper editor attempts to get back at his superstitious ex-girlfriend by screwing with her horoscope.

Also included are "Don't Eat Cat" and "Statistical Abstract of My Hometown, Spokane, Washington," both of which achieved cult status after their first publication online. This collection reveals Jess Walter as a ridiculously talented writer and one of the freshest voices in American literature.

"A Country Doctor's Notebook" is a fascinating blend of autobiography and fiction by the esteemed author Mikhail Bulgakov, known for his masterpiece, The Master and Margarita. This collection provides a glimpse into the early years of Bulgakov's career, showcasing a master at the dawn of his craft.

In 1916, a 25-year-old, newly qualified doctor named Mikhail Bulgakov was posted to the remote Russian countryside. Armed with a diploma and a complete lack of field experience, he faced numerous challenges, including covering a vast and sprawling territory untouched by modern conveniences such as the motor car, the telephone, and electric lights.

The stories in A Country Doctor’s Notebook are based on this two-year window in Bulgakov's life. He candidly shares his feelings of inadequacy and warmly conjures episodes like peasants applying medicine to their outer clothing rather than their skin, and finding himself charged with delivering a baby—having only read about the procedure in textbooks.

Not yet marked by the dark fantasy of his later writing, this early work features a realistic and engaging narrative voice—the voice of twentieth-century Russia’s greatest writer.

It's one thing to learn to curtsy properly. It's quite another to learn to curtsy and throw a knife at the same time.
Welcome to Finishing School.

Fourteen-year-old Sophronia is a great trial to her poor mother. Sophronia is more interested in dismantling clocks and climbing trees than proper manners—and the family can only hope that company never sees her atrocious curtsy.

Mrs. Temminnick is desperate for her daughter to become a proper lady. So she enrolls Sophronia in Mademoiselle Geraldine's Finishing Academy for Young Ladies of Quality. But Sophronia soon realizes the school is not quite what her mother might have hoped.

At Mademoiselle Geraldine's, young ladies learn to finish...everything. Certainly, they learn the fine arts of dance, dress, and etiquette, but they also learn to deal out death, diversion, and espionage—in the politest possible ways, of course. Sophronia and her friends are in for a rousing first year's education.

Life in Outer Space is a heartwarming tale that follows Sam Kinnison, a geeky sixteen-year-old with a passion for movies, games, and all things horror. He's content in his world of nerdy pursuits until the arrival of Camilla Carter, a girl who's not just beautiful and friendly but also seemingly out of Sam's league.

Despite Sam's determination to stick to his movie-guided life plan and ignore Camilla, she has her own agenda that surprisingly includes him. As they grow closer, Sam discovers the joys of true friendship and begins to question if he's been learning from the right movies. Melissa Keil's debut young adult novel is a sweet and humorous exploration of high school life, love, and the confusion that comes with growing up.

The Northern California town of Big Beaver has become a haven for Bigfoot, alien sightings, and is home to The Phantom Bigfoot Bather. One particularly weird Beaverite, Duane, has kept the Bigfoot a secret, but to his utter dismay, a female Bigfoot abducts a teenager. Duane must use all his guile to stop his secret from getting out, especially now that MB, his close friend and crypto-zoologist, is on the trail, along with Sheriff Lou and the FBI. Can Duane keep his Bigfoot friends a secret? And what does MB discover deep in the forest?

Tall, dark, and mysterious—Ryder Black is everything a girl wants. The catch? He’s trouble. Naturally, he’s irresistibly charming. Surprisingly, he’s impressively academic, too. But it’s his knack for getting into fights that makes him notorious.

Dorky, clumsy, and just plain odd—April Hale talks like Yoda, eats her food based on the day of the week, and prefers binge watching TV shows to partying. She has also spent the past few years eavesdropping on the Blacks’ morning fights. It was her daily routine. Until that one morning that Ryder catches her looking into his bedroom window… and she becomes all but anonymous in his eyes.

Hell-bent on making contact, Ryder gets a sneak peek into the quirky world of April when she stuffs all of her fingers in her mouth and faints the first time he talks to her.

She’s unusual. He’s captivated.

In this delightfully wacky and fun story, we discover that sometimes what makes us outcasts from the world are the very things that make us special. Join April and Ryder in their journey to discovering more about life… and about each other. It will give you butterflies in the stomach, tickle your funny bones, and pull at your heartstrings until the very last page.

A book about absolutely nothing at all. A novel that isn't about any subject at all including fiction, nonfiction, fantasy or anything else that could be written about. This book is solely for entertainment and a conversation piece. Please do not take it seriously.

Who is Pusheen? This collection of oh-so-cute kitty comics—featuring the chubby, tubby tabby who has taken the Internet by storm—will fill you in on all the basics.

Things you should know about Pusheen:

Birthday: February 18
Sex: Female
Where she lives: In the house, on the couch, underfoot
Her favorite pastime: Blogging, sleeping
Her best feature: Her toe beans
Her favorite food: All of them

Pusheen is a pleasantly plump cat who has warmed hearts and tickled funny bones of millions worldwide with her signature GIF animated bops, bounces, and tail wiggles. Now, Pusheen is ready to make the leap from digital to print in her first comic collection! Learn what makes her purr and find out why millions of people have already fallen in love with this naughty, adorable kitty.

Featuring some of the most popular stories from Pusheen’s Tumblr and Facebook pages (plus a healthy serving of never-before-seen material), I Am Pusheen the Cat is a treat for cat lovers and comics fans alike.

A funny, poignant and revealing novel that’s become a huge word-of-mouth hit in the USA.

Hildy Good has reached that dangerous time in a woman's life - middle-aged and divorced, she is an oddity in her small but privileged town. But Hildy isn't one for self-pity and instead meets the world with a wry smile, a dark wit and a glass or two of Pinot Noir. When her two earnest grown-up children stage 'an intervention' and pack Hildy off to an addiction centre, she thinks all this fuss is ridiculous. After all, why shouldn't Hildy enjoy a drink now and then?

A narcissistic teenager who doesn't believe in destiny.

A city under supernatural attack.

An adventure that unfortunately changes everything.

Sixteen-year-old Hamilton Dinger leads a charmed life. He's got the grades for the top of the class, the abilities of a star athlete and Tetris player, and the charisma to get away with anything. Everything seems to be going along perfectly, including his plans to ask out Gwen Kessler, as he enters into tenth grade at Apollo Central High School.

Everything, that is, until a meteor crashes into the city, releasing the Seven Deadly Sinisters and their leader, Orpheus, from their celestial prison, and awakening Hamilton's longtime dormant supernatural abilities. Suddenly Hamilton finds himself reluctantly allied with his self-declared mentor, Elysian, a changeling dragon, and Starry Knight, a beautiful but dangerous warrior, as they seek to protect the souls of Apollo City from the Sinisters and their evil intentions.

Can Hamilton give up his self-proclaimed entitlement to happiness in order to follow the call of a duty he doesn't want? More importantly, will he willingly sacrifice all he has to find out the truth?

At the time, I didn't really believe that anything outside my control would change my life. Or at least, not in a significant, substantial way. My life was all about myself, and I figured I had complete control over that. Anything that happened outside of my control was more or less because I let it happen, and didn't feel like stopping it.

It's funny how one disaster of epic proportion can really make you change your mind.

Welcome to the epic world of The Starlight Chronicles, a young adult fantasy series about a team of fallen Stars with supernatural powers. Follow them through this alternatively snarky and sweet series as they become their city's resident superheroes, with all the fun and frustration of dragons and swords and homework!

As the veteran manga artists start taking over Weekly Shonen Jump, the younger artists feel the pressure. But what is behind this sudden surge of older artists making a comeback in the magazine? And what is the connection between Azuma and Moritaka’s late uncle?

Don't cross your eyes or they'll stay like that!

Feed a cold, starve a fever!

Don't touch your Halloween candy until we get it checked out!

Never run with scissors.

Don't look in the microwave while it's running!

This will go down on your permanent record.

Is any of it true? If so, how true? Ken Jennings wants to find out if mother and father always know best. Yes, all those years you were told not to sit too close to the television (you'll hurt your eyes!) or swallow your gum (it stays in your stomach for seven years!) or crack your knuckles (arthritis!) are called into question by our country's leading trivia guru.

Jennings separates myth from fact to debunk a wide variety of parental edicts: no swimming after meals, sit up straight, don't talk to strangers, and so on.

Armed with medical case histories, scientific findings, and even the occasional experiment on himself (or his kids), Jennings exposes countless examples of parental wisdom run amok. Whether you're a parent who wants to know what you can stop worrying about or a kid (of any age) looking to say, "I told you so," this is the anti-helicopter parenting book you've been waiting for.

Average student Moritaka Mashiro enjoys drawing for fun. When his classmate and aspiring writer Akito Takagi discovers his talent, he begs Moritaka to team up with him as a manga-creating duo. But what exactly does it take to make it in the manga-publishing world?

Struck By Lightning: The Carson Phillips Journal follows the story of outcast high school senior Carson Phillips, who blackmails the most popular students in his school into contributing to his literary journal to bolster his college application; his goal in life is to get into Northwestern and eventually become the editor of The New Yorker. At once laugh-out-loud funny, deliciously dark, and remarkably smart, Struck By Lightning unearths the dirt that lies just below the surface of high school.

At a time when bullying torments so many young people today, this unique and important novel sheds light with humor and wit on an issue that deeply resonates with countless teens and readers.

The Complete Calvin and Hobbes is a celebration of one of the most iconic comic strips of all time. This collection brings together every Calvin and Hobbes cartoon that was syndicated from its beginning in 1985 until its end in 1996. Presented in a beautiful three-volume, hardcover set within a sturdy slipcase, these four-color editions showcase the adventures of the imaginative Calvin and his real-only-to-him tiger companion, Hobbes.

Fans of the series will find all their favorite moments in these pages, with three daily black and white strips per page and full-color Sunday comics. Additional full-page color illustrations, poems, and stories from other collections are also included, making this a must-have for any Calvin and Hobbes enthusiast. With a heartfelt introduction by Bill Watterson himself, this compendium is a tribute to the timeless magic and humor of Calvin and Hobbes.

Cartoonist Ellen Forney explores the intriguing relationship between “crazy” and “creative” in this graphic memoir of her own bipolar disorder. The narrative is beautifully woven with stories of famous bipolar artists and writers.

Shortly before her thirtieth birthday, Forney was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Flagrantly manic and terrified that medications would cause her to lose her creativity, she began a years-long struggle to find mental stability while retaining her passions and creativity.

In her search to make sense of the popular concept of the “crazy artist”, she finds inspiration from the lives and work of other artists and writers who suffered from mood disorders, including Vincent van Gogh, Georgia O’Keeffe, William Styron, and Sylvia Plath. She also delves into the clinical aspects of bipolar disorder, discussing the strengths and limitations of various treatments and medications.

Darkly funny and intensely personal, Forney’s memoir provides a visceral glimpse into the effects of a mood disorder on an artist’s work. She shares her own story through bold black-and-white images and evocative prose, making this a truly unique and engaging read.

Lissa is done with the constant rivalry between the football and soccer teams at Hamilton High. Her quarterback boyfriend's attention is always divided, leading her to initiate a hookup strike among the players' girlfriends. The goal: to force the teams to make peace. But the strike sparks a new challenge, a girls-against-boys showdown, with tensions running high both on and off the field. As the battle of wills escalates, Lissa finds herself grappling with unexpected feelings for the leader of the boys, Cash Sterling, complicating her plan even further.

Let’s face it: Greg Heffley will never change his wimpy ways. Somebody just needs to explain that to Greg’s father. You see, Frank Heffley actually thinks he can get his son to toughen up, and he enlists Greg in organized sports and other “manly” endeavors. Of course, Greg is able to easily sidestep his father’s efforts to change him. But when Greg’s dad threatens to send him to military academy, Greg realizes he has to shape up . . . or get shipped out.

Greg and his family and friends, who make the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books a must-read for middle school readers, are back and at their best in this hilarious new installment of the series, which is sure to please current fans while attracting new ones.

Paranormal private eye. Grim reaper extraordinaire. Whatever. Charley Davidson is back! And she's drinking copious amounts of caffeine to stay awake because, every time she closes her eyes, she sees him: Reyes Farrow, the part-human, part-supermodel son of Satan. Yes, she did imprison him for all eternity, but come on. How is she supposed to solve a missing persons case, deal with an ego-driven doctor, calm her curmudgeonly dad, and take on a motorcycle gang hell-bent on murder when the devil's son just won't give up?

The adventure began in a fading town. Far from anyone he knew or trusted, a young Lemony Snicket started an apprenticeship for a secret organization shrouded in mystery and secrecy. He asked questions that shouldn't have been on his mind. Now he has written an account that should not be published that shouldn't be read. Not even by you.

Seriously, we recommend that you do NOT ask your parents for this, the first book in his new ALL THE WRONG QUESTIONS series. Lemony Snicket, in case you don't already know, grew up to be the author of A Series of Unfortunate Events series.

Thirteen-year-old Lemony Snicket begins his apprenticeship with S. Theodora Markson of the secretive V.F.D. in the tiny dot of a town called Stain'd By The Sea, where he helps investigate the theft of a statue.

Kafka's first and funniest novel, Amerika tells the story of the young immigrant Karl Rossmann who, after an embarrassing sexual misadventure, finds himself "packed off to America" by his parents. Expected to redeem himself in this magical land of opportunity, young Karl is swept up instead in a whirlwind of dizzying reversals, strange escapades, and picaresque adventures.

Although Kafka never visited America, images of its vast landscape, dangers, and opportunities inspired this saga of the "golden land." Here is a startlingly modern, fantastic and visionary tale of America "as a place no one has yet seen, in a historical period that can't be identified," writes E. L. Doctorow in his new foreword. "Kafka made his novel from his own mind's mythic elements," Doctorow explains, "and the research data that caught his eye were bent like rays in a field of gravity."

If your cat is kneading you, that's not a sign of affection. Your cat is actually checking your internal organs for weakness.

If your cat brings you a dead animal, this isn't a gift. It's a warning.

How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You is an offering of cat comics, facts, and instructional guides from the creative wonderland at TheOatmeal.com.

How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You presents fan favorites, such as "Cat vs. Internet," "How to Pet a Kitty," and "The Bobcats," plus 17 brand-new, never-before-seen cat jokes.

A pullout poster is included at the back of the book.

Sherman Alexie’s stature as a writer of stories, poems, and novels has soared over the course of his twenty-book, twenty-year career. His wide-ranging, acclaimed stories from the last two decades, from The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven to his most recent PEN/Faulkner award-winning War Dances, have established him as a star in modern literature.

A bold and irreverent observer of life among Native Americans in the Pacific Northwest, the daring, versatile, funny, and outrageous Alexie showcases all his talents in his newest collection, Blasphemy, where he unites fifteen beloved classics with sixteen new stories in one sweeping anthology for devoted fans and first-time readers.

Included here are some of his most esteemed tales, including "What You Pawn I Will Redeem," "This is What it Means to Say Phoenix, Arizona,” "The Toughest Indian in the World,” and "War Dances.” Alexie’s new stories are fresh and quintessential—about donkey basketball leagues, lethal wind turbines, the reservation, marriage, and all species of contemporary American warriors.

An indispensable collection of new and classic stories, Blasphemy reminds us, on every thrilling page, why Sherman Alexie is one of our greatest contemporary writers and a true master of the short story.

And girl created boy…

In the beginning, there was an apple— And then there was a car crash, a horrible injury, and a hospital. But before Evening Spiker’s head clears, a strange boy named Solo is rushing her to her mother’s research facility. There, under the best care available, Eve is left alone to heal.

Just when Eve thinks she will die—not from her injuries, but from boredom—her mother gives her a special project: Create the perfect boy.

Using an amazingly detailed simulation, Eve starts building a boy from the ground up. Eve is creating Adam. And he will be just perfect... won’t he?

Nikki Maxwell authors an advice column for the school newspaper in this fifth book of the New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series.

Nikki Maxwell develops a sudden interest in student journalism that may or may not (okay, definitely does) have to do with the fact that mean girl MacKenzie has started writing a gossip column. And there just might be some juicy info involving Nikki’s crush, Brandon, that Nikki doesn’t want MacKenzie reporting to the world.

So Nikki joins the school newspaper staff—and ends up as an advice columnist! It’s fun at first, answering other kids’ letters. But when Miss Know-It-All’s inbox is suddenly overflowing with pleas for guidance, Nikki feels in need of some help herself. Fortunately, she has BFFs Chloe and Zoey on her side—and at her keyboard!

The hilarious, beloved cohost of TLC’s What Not to Wear examines the universal obstacles all women—including herself—put in their way.

With her unique talent for seeing past disastrous wardrobes to the core emotional issues that caused these sartorial crises, style savant Stacy London has transformed not only the looks but also the lives of hundreds of guests who have appeared on What Not to Wear. Now for the first time in print, London turns that expert X-ray insight on herself.

Like the women she’s transformed, London has plenty of emotional baggage. At eleven, she suffered from severe psoriasis that left her with permanent physical and mental scars. During college, she became anorexic on a misguided quest for perfection. By the time she joined the staff at Vogue, London’s weight had doubled from binge eating. Although self-esteem and self-consciousness nearly sabotaged a promising career, London learned the hard way that we wear our insecurities every day. It wasn’t until she found the self-confidence to develop a strong personal style that she finally became comfortable in her skin.

In The Truth About Style, London shares her own often painful history and her philosophy of the healing power of personal style—illustrating it with a series of detailed “start-overs” with eight real women, demonstrating how personal style helps them overcome the emotional obstacles we all face. For anyone who has ever despaired of finding the right clothes, or even taking an objective assessment in a full-length mirror, The Truth About Style will be an inspiring, liberating, and often very funny guide to finding the expression of your truest self.

On a beach in the Dominican Republic, a doomed relationship flounders. In the heat of a hospital laundry room in New Jersey, a woman does her lover's washing and thinks about his wife. In Boston, a man buys his love child, his only son, a first baseball bat and glove. At the heart of these stories is the irrepressible, irresistible Yunior, a young hardhead whose longing for love is equaled only by his recklessness—and by the extraordinary women he loves and loses: artistic Alma; the aging Miss Lora; Magdalena, who thinks all Dominican men are cheaters; and the love of his life, whose heartbreak ultimately becomes his own.

In prose that is endlessly energetic, inventive, tender, and funny, the stories in This Is How You Lose Her lay bare the infinite longing and inevitable weakness of the human heart. They remind us that passion always triumphs over experience, and that “the half-life of love is forever.”

Switch Bitch is a collection of four tales of seduction and suspense, masterfully told by the grand master of the short story, Roald Dahl.

The Visitor and Bitch feature Dahl's notorious hedonist Oswald Hendryks Cornelius, or plain old Uncle Oswald, whose exploits are as extraordinary as they are scandalous.

The Great Switcheroo and The Last Act explore a darker side of desire and pleasure, capturing the ins and outs, highs and lows of sex through black comedy.

Roald Dahl, the brilliant and worldwide acclaimed author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James and the Giant Peach, and Matilda, also wrote scores of short stories for adults. These delightfully disturbing tales have often been filmed and were the inspiration for the West End play Roald Dahl’s Twisted Tales by Jeremy Dyson.

Over 50 years after their original publication, Roald Dahl’s stories continue to entertain and make readers shiver today.

Bernadette Fox has vanished. When her daughter Bee claims a family trip to Antarctica as a reward for perfect grades, Bernadette, a fiercely intelligent shut-in, throws herself into preparations for the trip. But worn down by years of trying to live the Seattle life she never wanted, Ms. Fox is on the brink of a meltdown. And after a school fundraiser goes disastrously awry at her hands, she disappears, leaving her family to pick up the pieces--which is exactly what Bee does, weaving together an elaborate web of emails, invoices, and school memos that reveals a secret past Bernadette has been hiding for decades. Where'd You Go Bernadette is an ingenious and unabashedly entertaining novel about a family coming to terms with who they are and the power of a daughter's love for her mother.

It all started with a stolen magic spell. Throw in a powerful sorceress, a teen alchemist in desperate need of a haircut, a fearless king in love with a hot-tempered witch, a demonic shadow with a penchant for turning to mist, a cunning cellar sprite, and an army of invisible knights - all looking for a pair of bickering Earthlings...

"Come back here at midnight, Ricky"

11-year-old Ricky watches in stunned silence as those words magically appear in the stars during a show at the Chicago Space Museum. But why can't anyone else see the message? And why must he bring Jello?

His teenage sister, Allie, follows him back to the theater at midnight. They're both whisked through a door in the sky to the kingdom of Galdoren, where they quickly befriend a mischievous star and make a powerful enemy of Queen Glacidia, a witch who rules over a land of never-ending winter.

On their quest to reach a castle riddled with secrets, the siblings will encounter a magic carpet with a terrible sense of direction, a cowardly dragon, a hero in a flying wheelchair, and a candy farm with exploding fields of overripe Red Hots.

Will that scruffy teen alchemist, Henry, be able to master his spell book in time to help? And will Ricky ever get the hang of flying, or will he forever be banging his head against the light fixtures?

The Door in the Sky will transport you to a world overflowing with magic, breathless adventure, and laugh-out-loud humor. Each cliff-hanging chapter will keep you reading well past your bedtime and burning up the batteries to your book light.